Fancy hotels

Faithful readers of other rubbish I’ve written since Paul died will remember the struggle I had the first time I found myself having to travel to Seattle for work on my own. There was something very wrong about staying in a 5-Star hotel without Paul.

Before he died, Paul would travel with me when I went away for work. We’d stay in a fancy hotel, go out for a fancy dinner, then sit in the hotel lounge drinking martinis in our best “la-de-da” fashion. The next day, when I was in meetings, Paul would take advantage of the hotel’s gym and swimming pool facilities. Depending on my schedule, we’d meet for lunch and/or go shopping. It was truly wonderful!

I remember my first stay in a fancy hotel for work after he died. It was so difficult; I felt so lost. My second work trip was a bit easier, but still had its challenges; my third was a bit easier still. And now, I’ve created a whole new fancy hotel routine that includes relaxing on a big fluffy bed and ordering room service.

Tonight finds me in Seattle at The Westin. It’s a fantastic room—though not as big and flash as the a-MAZE-ing room I stayed at in Edinburgh a year ago—and the view of the city is truly breath-taking. (If you like the view of downtown Seattle with the Puget Sound behind.)

I looked at the room service menu and was very unimpressed so instead, I’ve ordered a pizza from Pagliacci —something I’ve not done since Paul and I lived in downtown Seattle so many years ago. And wouldn’t you know it? They also had Thomas Kemper’s root beer, too! (Yum!)

So, here I sit eating pizza, drinking root beer, and working on today’s homework assignment for my online silliness class. It’s relaxing and enjoyable. I can’t believe how much easier this hotel stay is than that first one without Paul about a year ago. Though I still wish Paul was here to enjoy a dirty martini at the lounge downstairs.

3 thoughts on “Fancy hotels

  1. i can’t make up my mind whether it’s kind or cruel that life continues on despite what’s thrown at us, and that eventually we seem to adapt to carry on too. i could wiffle on about innner strengths and being your own person and so on …. but i think that instead i’ll just enjoy your hotel moment (and later your silliness – the wee guy and i have signed up with the intention of being sillier together)

    • Two things that Paul said often were 1) “If I die, you have to keep living and be happy” and 2) “Different doesn’t mean better or worse, it just means different”.

      So, the life I have is different. I do think it’s a matter of different being worse in this case, but it’s the life I have and I can’t get the old one back so must move forward regardless of if I want to or not. And so, I’m going to take this crummy ‘different’ life and keep living it in the hopes of finding happiness.

      In my mind, it’s a very kind thing that life continues. If it didn’t, I’d never be able to fulfill my promise to Paul that I’d try to find happiness if something happened to him. Of course, I also told him I’d try to date David Tennant or John Hannah to fill the void and loneliness… must start working on that part of the promise! 😉

  2. Well done you, Frances. Hotelery on your own is hard at the best of times, and must be a million times harder when you and Paul used to make it into such a treat.

    As ever your wisdom outstrips your years, grasshopper (I have just finished a double dose of silliness so expect no sense in my comments tonight by the way!) and your approach to life is absolutely spot on.

    I can just hear Paul telling you to live and be happy. I whole heartedly agree – but I’m sorry I’m fighting you for both David and John – I saw them first!!

    xx

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